Tonight I'm having trouble concentrating. Every time I sit down to do something, something else grabs my attention. (A good example is this entry, which is taking far too long to write because I keep trying to work on Matt's Rubik's cube.) This (hopefully temporary) bout of ADD is probably a side-effect of mourning. I have a hard enough time finishing projects as it is - something else is always coming up. Now finishing projects has become darn near impossible. To complicate this, I keep finding reasons to get out and generally not be in my room. On the one hand this is great, because I keep hanging out with people I haven't hung out with in over a year. On the other had, this is bad because I'm not taking enough time out for myself to really feel and really get a grip on myself and my feelings. I need to find a healthy balance.
( Depression gets a second wind )
I want to let myself feel depressed in one continuous time frame. I just want to get the ickiness of mourning over with. I want to feel something, but I'm so easily distractable right now that when I start to cry something in my head says "Oooh look! A shiny. It's outside. I'm going to go follow the shiny outside." And then, I can't cry anymore.
I'm going to stop here. I just picked up the Rubik's cube for the 100th time tonight. I'm too distracted to even
( Depression gets a second wind )
I want to let myself feel depressed in one continuous time frame. I just want to get the ickiness of mourning over with. I want to feel something, but I'm so easily distractable right now that when I start to cry something in my head says "Oooh look! A shiny. It's outside. I'm going to go follow the shiny outside." And then, I can't cry anymore.
I'm going to stop here. I just picked up the Rubik's cube for the 100th time tonight. I'm too distracted to even